http://www.ted.com/talks/jay_walker_on_the_world_s_english_mania.html

Kevennyksenä tä Italian tourist joke:

One day I go to Toronto and stay in a bigga hotel.

I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella the waitress I wanna two pissa toast. She bring me only one piss.

I tella her I wanna two piss; she say, go to toilet - I say, you no understand, I wanna two piss on my plate. She say you betta no piss on plate, you sonna ma bitch! I don't even know lady, she calla me somma ma bitch.

Then I go to pharmacia with a cougha. The man he give me candy ana tell me fa cough! - I don't even know man ana he tella me FA COUGH!

Later I got to eat soma lunch at Ricky's Place, the waitress she bring me spoon, a knife but no fock. I tella her I wanna fock - She tell me everybody wanna fock. I tella her, you no understand, I wanna fock on table. She say you betta not fock on table you sonna ma bitch - I not even know lady ana she call me sonna ma bitch.

So, I go back to my hotel room, an there's no sheet on my bed. I calla the manager and tella him I wanna sheet, he tell me go to toilet. So, I say, you no understand, I wanna sheet on bed. He say you betta not sheet on bed you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know man ana he call me sonna ma bitch!

I go to check out of hotel and man at desk say peace to you. I say peace on you too!, you sonna ma bitch! - I GO BACK TO ITALY!!!